End of Jan

Well Chris is off again. I really hate the times when hes only home for one maybe two days and then he is gone again. You feel rushed to get everything done and to spend time together. Its easier to deal with when hes here for a full week.
 My settlement came in which is a life saver. Now we can get bills paid off and get that stress off of us. I am excited about that :) It will be nice to not worry about which bill needs to be paid and where the money is going to come from. I am excited about owning my truck out right and not having that payment any more :) Now its just to saving the money to buy a house and then we will be set to go. We have not decided yet which area we are going to buy in but we are looking to see what will be right for us.

  For us this year is all about changes and making ourselves better and healthier people. It has started out so positive and seems to be staying that way. Hopefully 6 months from now I can say the same thing lol. 

The joys of being an adult

You wake up one morning and realize that you are no longer a kid. The things that you used to do are things that you now look back at and think "what in the world was I thinking." During my life I have met a lot of people. Every one of those people from the friends I grew up with to the family that has been added through out the years has been an important part in making me who I am today. Each person has played an important role in helping me to be the best that I can be. When you get close to people you go through the ups and the downs with them.  You become the ear to listen, the shoulder to cry on. I know that a lot of my friends and family have been there for me through my hard times as well. I think the most heart braking times is when the people that we care about hit rock bottom. You want to jump in and make everything better. You want to wrap them in your arms and protect them from everything that is going on in their lives. It is so hard to step back and let them work through their problems on their own. To not give advice and to suggest things would be better if they would only do this or that. Then there are times that you get the phone call or the text message that makes your heart brake and you have no idea how to help. You feel helpless and just want to make it all better. Over the past couple of weeks I have been handed a couple of these situations. There is much confusion, heartbreak, and many tears that have been shed. People have told me many of times to let go of my worries and allow God to take them and fix them in his way. I have been trying so hard to just let it go and allow him to work his ways. Its so hard to let things go.

  A soldier who is fighting for our freedom and his family were given a tough road to travel this week and in the end God came through and his baby girl was able to go home from the hospital today after being diagnosed with have a stroke at 4 days old. If it was not for the faith of the family, friends and people who dont even know them things may not have turned out so well. Thank you Travis for everything that you do for our country, Thank you Kasi for being the fantastic wife, mother and friend that you are! Baby Abbigayle my prayers are with you little one as you continue your life and become an amazing woman that I know your mama and dad will help you to be.

There have been tough times within our family as well. Family members have walked away and turned their backs on each other. There have been many of hearts broken and tears shed. I dont understand why people think that if they turn their backs and lie and walk away that all the problems go away. I wish that people would understand that more hearts are broken by words left unsaid then by the lies that are told. I have had fights with family members and am so thankful that those have been resolved and now things are going well. I have gained contact with some whom I have not talked to in years. I could not ask for more. I am so thankful for each person who is in my life, for each of those who have passed through my life and those who are to come.


I ask that those who read this say a prayer for our family. That there will be peace, love reignited and bridges rebuilt. You can do all things through Christ and everything that he brings us to he will bring us through.

On a happier note my dad is going after something that he has wanted for a while now. I am so proud of him and so proud that he is my dad. He is such a positive role model and I love him so very much. Prayers for him and my Step mom and my little brother Zach that he is able to get this position at work and that their lives will be blessed this year with everything that they need.

Down Day

I have dealt with Chris being gone off and on for so long that you would think it would be just another part of life. Most the time I have no problems with it and I manage and deal and just move forward with whatever it is I need to do. This time around it is really killing me. I've been sick which probably has a lot to do with it, but still. All I want is for him to come home and be here with me. Our four legged creatures who I love to death are driving me up the wall and I am ready to be away from them for a while. Not sure what that is all about either. I guess everything is just driving me crazy and irritating me this go around. Hopefully here before long I will feel better and wont feel this way lol.

As for Chris he is traveling the US in a matter of a week. Ok not the whole US but close. He left Texas Friday and stopped in Oklahoma and then traveled through Kansas into Colorado where he stayed for three days. Then he was shipped off to North Dakota via Wyoming and Montana. He arrived in North Dakota Tuesday morning just be told that he has to be in Arkansas on Monday morning. So hes on the road again. As of an hour ago he was in Bismark North Dakota dropping some stuff off and then he will be headed out again. Long trip for one person to make by themselves, but hes done it before and I am sure that he will do it again. Praying that he makes it through without any problems. Its always nerve racking when he is on the road by himself with nasty weather conditions and winter weather. So lots and lots of prayers for safe travels and some rest.

On another note Sasha is going into the vet in two weeks and I have a feeling that the vet is going to tell us its time to put her down. She is having problems walking up and down the stairs, shes not really eating and shes coughing all the time. I knew the day would come and we would have to say good bye, but you are never really prepared for it. I just dont want to see her suffer any more. So whatever the vet says is what we will do. Nerve racking and stressful but I will get through it. Confederate and Harley are doing well. Confederate is starting to get gray under his chin and on his chest. Its hard to believe that he is 7 years old already. Seems like just yesterday he was a puppy and playing in the water. Harley just turned a year old. she is going in at the same time as Sasha to get De-clawed. She thinks that every piece of furniture is a scratching post for her and we have tried all the sprays and everything that the vet recommended so the claws are coming out. I dont worry about the dogs and her, they pretty much know that she is boss and they just have to deal with it LOL. On Saturday Kasi Sue had Abbigayle! That was exciting! She is such a beautiful little girl. Unfortunately she was rushed to the hospital on monday due to having seizures. The doctors first told them that there was bleeding in her brain so they did an MRI, found out it was not bleeding which meant no swelling to the brain, but it was a misshaped vessel. They Abbigayle on meds and did a CT scan the next day. Then decided to do an angioplazy in order to inject the dye into her system so the doctors could see what was going on better. This came back clear and the vessel was gone. She was moved out of the NICU yesterday, today they took the IV out, but they are still not ready to let her go home. Lots and lots of prayers are needed for this family. Travis is in the military and is home on R and R right now, but he is scheduled to leave again here soon. Lots and lots of prayers for him and his fellow soldiers who are fighting for us. Lots of love to all of you!

Being apart

Chris left on friday and we have no idea how long its going to be, before he gets to come home again. At times I feel like I am a married widow the way the company sends him away. I know that there are a million people out there that deal with their loved ones being gone for longer periods of time. I cant say that I know how they feel because its different for everyone. There are times that I thrive while he is gone. Getting a tone of stuff done and taking care of the house and animals and myself. This time around I am sick and wish he was here lol. Sound like a big baby? Yeah just a little bit lol.

I am so excited about what is going to happen this year for chris and I. Being able to become debt free, buy our first home and whatever else comes our way. Its the most exciting thing that I can think of. I have been looking for furniture and wall paint and thinking about where I want things and what kinds of floors I want and so on. Its exciting. I make a list of everything that I like and chris and I sit down together and go over it along with the list that he has made and we come to agreements on everything that we both want in the house. I love love love that we can do this together. That we can make these decisions as a couple and be happy with what we have come out with. I have dated other people, but this is the first time that I found somebody who likes the same things that I do and has almost the same sense of design and colors that I do. I love him more then I can put into words and truly miss him very very much. On the positive side right now he is able to spend time with his parents for at least two days. Maybe more.

Car Accident may 2009 Update

So its been almost three years since my accident. We have finally come to terms with the other guys insurance and are coming to an end in this long battle. We found out yesterday that we will be receiving a check for $12,000.00 for the pay off of this case. It could not come at a better time for us. We are in the process of trying to get things paid off so that we can buy our first house. We have already found the house that we want and the area that we want it in. Getting this money allows us to pay off my truck and a lot of other bills and get people paid back. Its an amazing feeling to know that we will pretty much be debt free by the end of this year instead of next year. I am very excited that we are finally reaching our goals and making things happen for us. Its been a long journey and its finally coming to an end. I am in the process of taking my school stuff to were I want it to be. Very excited about where it is going . A few more years and I will be done.
Chris is gone again for a few weeks. Which sucks but thats ok. It allows me to get to things done around the house. He is thinking about taking things in a different route next year as far as work goes. We will see where that goes as the year goes on. I hope that he finds what he wants and can be happy again.
I have doctors appointments set up non stop it seems like over the next couple of months and am looking surgery with in the next month or so. I will give more information once I know what is going on and when.
I hope that 2012 has been a good year so far for all of you!